We are educated to classify people in groups. Some people identify themselves as black, white, Hispanic, brown and so on. We love to put things in groups.
For some it is the values of patriarchy that speaks to the core of who they are. Others are convinced that their feminism is what makes them human. “We are all equal” they shout and the church of God screams amen.
Challenging thought paradigms for me started as early as age 6. This young woman was as fascinated with life as the little hibiscus in front of her parents’ small apartment. Like the flower, I wanted to blossom. I would go on to observe the adults around me in awe. I quickly noticed the body language and spoken words lived in different nations. People would say what they don’t mean to avoid conflict. To my young mind, adults spent a whole lot of time scheming their way through life. Two people could hate each other and pretend to love. What was rather puzzling to me was that it seemed to work, until a minor infraction occurs and all hell was let loose.
The nature of my curious mind made loving books easy. I was drawn to the magical world of mysticism, religion and books. I ate it all up with careless abandon and a deep seated need to go beyond the surface. I wanted to know people as they are. Soul to soul if you like. Anything sort of deep soulful connections, would turn my initial excitement to indifference.
As a teenager in the university my classmates became accustomed to my critical thinking debates. Some named me Margaret Thatcher, for others Ita Giwa was the name I forgot to disclose. The label feminism was thrown around after a term paper that saw me arguing that “what a man can do a woman cannot do better”. Even though I did not agree with the popular saying, many concluded I am a closet feminist. After all, it would take some balls to admit that our society.
My naked dance with religion, added some more confusion to the need to give me a label. I went from Catholicism to Pentecostalism in equal ferocity and confusion. Each encounter with a different brand of Christianity satisfied some parts of my soul, leaving my spirit in search for one universal truth. Some questions that kept me awake were:
Is God one universal force of creation or several?
Did man create God?
Can God Speak?
What does it mean to know God?
Who am I?
These questions took me from the Bible to Eastern religions. The answer I was looking for didn’t come waltzing into my already exhausted brain cells. When nothing worked I stopped churching all together. I needed to stop the noise of offering baskets and a hustling tithe collector to find God for myself or unlearn God if there was nothing to be found.
It would take several life experiences for me to hear what I am comfortable calling “The Voice of God”. That still small voice that is found in silence and chaos. That voice that speaks when your own logical wisdom ends. That voice that needs no definition or labels. The voice that came alive as I read the Bible again from the beginning without the bias of a Preacher. That inner knowing that you would be okay no matter how the pendulum swings not because you know what to do but because even before you were born He knows you.
What is in a label? What does it matter, how people define your essence? I am a genderless soul in a feminine body and form. I am neither black nor white, patriarch or feminist, I am who I am. No definitions necessary as it limits the quantum waves of my curious mind. I have no use to confine my possibilities to labels subject to the changing forces of individual and collective realizations.
I am the moving soul of consciousness manifesting itself in human form. What does this mean, you ask?
I will tell you for free when you let go of your body and meet me soul to soul.
I am you and you are me. We are all connected. Separation is but an illusion, created in fear to keep us from loving each other. Meet my soul and let me meet yours. You will find that deep down, we are all children of the Most High. There are no truer feelings than knowing you are safe in a world filled with beautiful souls.
May the peace of the Lord be with you and with your spirit amen.